The Power of Daily Actions During COVID Jenn T. Grace, Ed Rocha, and Jennifer Brown
[00:00:00] Jennifer B: [00:00:00] Hello, Jennifer. Hello, Genti grace. How is this week treating you? So far so good. We’re on hump day. So we’re, we’re in good shape right now in good spirits. It’s nice weather. So I feel like to me, you know, for me, if the weather is nice, I’m okay. If it’s not nice.
[00:00:23] Yes. Spring is easing into, I think it’s stabilizing, right? It’s less kind of cold nights and rain, rain, rain, and it’s fine. The Northeast at least is finally starting to feel a little like summer. Dare we say it. I know, right. Especially when other parts of the country have been like in sweltering heat for months at this point already.
[00:00:43] And we’re like, finally, like it’s here and all three of us are in the Northeast. So we have New York, Connecticut, and Massachusetts, all, all, uh, in one little clump here. So Jen, do you know what week we’re in? I feel like this might be 12. I think this might be the [00:01:00] 12th week of doing these could be 13. It’s been awhile.
[00:01:05] So I think today’s conversation is going to be refreshing because we have ed with us. Hello, ed.
[00:01:15] Yeah. And I think it’s going to be a great conversation because it will be wrapped around what an ed is definitely going to share with us what you’ve been doing kind of throughout COVID. But I think Jen, you just said like, no, as it’s starting to, like, things are starting to change. And I think some of what we’ll talk about is like, how are we adapting with this new change of.
[00:01:37] Like things are reopening. Some people are going back to work. Some are not like, how are we all adapting to what’s going on? So I’m excited to see where this conversation takes us today. And what’s on your mind right now. I’m just going to throw it out. Leave it real. Open-ended for you. How are you feeling
[00:01:53] Ed: [00:01:53] today?
[00:01:54] Well, a quick introduction to my name is ed. I’m doing great. Beautiful weather. It’s [00:02:00] been horribly. LA here in new England, as we all know. No, I’m good. I’m excited. You know, I’m trying to remember what day it is, what dates it is that we’re moving forward a little bit at a time.
[00:02:16] Jennifer B: [00:02:16] You’re so awesome. I, um, and learning about you.
[00:02:19] I know you’ve been holding, um, 9:00 AM calls for a certain community, and it’s the little things that you’re really focusing in on that I appreciate. That you’re doing, um, like taking a shower and maybe putting shoes on, you know, so I love your work is like very, I know it’s not primarily what you, it is what you do, but you’re also not known for a lot of other expert pieces, like, um, language and culture education, for example, as one.
[00:02:47] And you’re multi-lingual and, you know, very like internationally oriented, um, So, but I love, I want to hear more about these calls and the rituals and the practices that you’ve discovered kind of ground us in [00:03:00] this time of uncertainty and they’re small and they’re doable. Right. And they have such an outsized impact on our ceiling.
[00:03:08] I would imagine that the feeling of confidence, the feeling of stability of perhaps from familiarity, the feeling of it’s going to be okay. How do we, how to in these small actions that you recommend, like, how do those work on us psychologically too, to help us manage the anxiety at this moment?
[00:03:27] Ed: [00:03:27] So back to back up like pre COVID, uh, I’m a doer.
[00:03:32] I created a system. Thinking languages or the role of method, which is do stuff. My personality is when things go awry, I think control. And I say, you call nine one one, and I take over the situation. That’s my personality. The scary part about COVID was what does somebody like myself do? Number one. And how do we respond to that?
[00:03:54] My husband is a physician assistant. He was redeployed in the hospital, working at COVID patients, scare the [00:04:00] crap out of me. And I think that one of the things that I’ve always been working on as a person, as a professional, as an expert is being honest and truthful. And it was, you know, and I tell everybody this was a scary experience, but then how do we respond to that?
[00:04:14] And so how I responded to that was. To read it two ways, one selfish, one community oriented, and I packaged it on this one. So selfish. I can sleep for hours. I take siestas everyday, culturally, I am Latino. I’m trained, um, to sleep the siesta and enjoy it. Number two. So I decided, and I reached out to my friends.
[00:04:36] I posted on Facebook and said, Hey guys, I know that for myself, I need somebody to help me wake up every morning or I’m going to stay asleep also because of the fear factor of, you know, you know, what’s happening. I also know that my depression mechanism is also asleep. That I, I respond in certain ways and this has been a, a journey of 10 years of therapy and yoga and spiritual [00:05:00] finding and exploring and running into warrants and things like that.
[00:05:02] So that’s, that’s me. So what I, so I decided what I needed to respond to, that I could protect myself and then to help when I incorporate my, my community. Right. And so I think that one of the reasons, one of the things that I wanted to do, what I do very well is I motivate people. People say I have an infectious personality.
[00:05:19] You may not feel it today, but I do have one. And the last part about it is that I formed tune and that’s one of my expertise is in management is I form teams. And so I decided that we were going to create a 9:00 AM goal-setting team. I didn’t know what that was or who it involved. And the community actually isn’t a space, but it was everybody’s invited.
[00:05:39] I have 3000 friends on Facebook. I posted it on my work page. We have 2000 followers, I believe on our, on my work page. And I was like, Hey guys, join me on this journey. And the one role, cause I know I don’t do this or wouldn’t do this. If I didn’t have to, the one rule is to take a shower. And that’s how we started.
[00:05:57] We had a zoom call. We had five [00:06:00] members. I was actually surprised at, from the people who dialed in that the first few calls, I was a little nervous that the 9:00 AM goal-setting calls is going to be me. Every day by myself and one would be hold. Uh, we had a, uh, um, a faculty member from one of the universities that lends on, uh, public health commissioner with my husband.
[00:06:21] She and I met in passing. Um, but she felt the urge to call. I had a former employee of mine from China dial in. Uh, we had an Italian with a fluid lift, actually, uh, as a, as a, uh, venture in my house as a student. So dialed in and actually was very depressed because he was, had been in quarantine and could not leave his house in seven or eight weeks.
[00:06:44] You needed some interaction with like, Oh, I could practice English as well. But we realize that all of us were suffering in a sort of different way. And we were reacting differently and we needed to come together somehow and it started with a call.
[00:06:58] Jennifer B: [00:06:58] So awesome. [00:07:00] And so what, what I find interesting is that if we look at our world pre COVID.
[00:07:05] Versus now in it. And who knows what the after is going to look like. The fact that just taking a shower is like a victory for people. So, and I, and it’s not like I’ve heard this from a lot of different people where it’s like, it’s almost like, Oh, you have wet hair. Like you’re bragging that you took a, you took a shower tonight.
[00:07:24] Ed: [00:07:24] One of the things that I’ve realized, and again, this is sort of me as a teacher and an educator, right. Is how we feel. There is a direct correlation in look how we dress. And those are simple things. What we put on on a daily basis, right? You want to clean up your life, wear black for the rest of your life, right.
[00:07:43] And stick to, it takes away to simplify your life. The simple thing of healing clean to in a positive way. I think that was one thing that we realized. The other thing that we realized is that. Are art in this, I think is something that we’re still working [00:08:00] on right now that we’re more vulnerable to the world.
[00:08:04] And so can we accept that vulnerability and how do we accept it? Right. So me putting on clothes actually, and taking a shower, combing my hair before I go live on Facebook regularly, like you guys do. And part of it is like, Oh, you’re very well put together. Well, that’s kind of my shield to the world.
[00:08:21] Right. And I think that that’s important that, you know, your don’t forget that you have a shield. Right. And I think that that’s something that’s important as we’re trying to cope. With whatever’s happening or whatever we’re going through that. And then goal setting. Part of it was actually came second. So what were your goals for today?
[00:08:39] Ping second after the shower part of it, because I was afraid that I wasn’t sure what, how are we going to continue this? Or like, it was boring. Okay. Hey, how’s it going? Oh, you took a shower. Great, fantastic. So then my management kicked in and I said, okay, Hey, three things reflect on yesterday. Tell me your three goals, whether you’re a, can you do them or not?
[00:08:59] It’s okay. [00:09:00] And I tell, start, and we started the, the first month of this. I mean, everybody say what you were grateful for because a lot of us, and I think that this is something that I try to tell everybody, like we’re privileged. Um, I come from a poor background in rural Texas. Um, my mother’s disabled as been her entire life.
[00:09:19] Uh, you know, they’re living on a fixed income. I can’t go visit them or chose not to go to separate cause my siblings taking care of them. But part of it also is sort of being honest, right. And we’re grateful and we’re privileged and we can do this and we’re able to do this and we’re not worried about food.
[00:09:37] And you know, I tell this to people when I’m talking about like goal setting project, it’s free. Right. You don’t have to pay for anything. Right. And, and like, you know, you don’t, but so yes, we’re privileged, but right now there’s great opportunity for us to take advantage of some of these resources that are out there to, you know, move, send, and trainings and things of that.
[00:10:00] [00:09:59] Jennifer B: [00:09:59] I would argue if you’re privileged, you should be creating free resources because of that. Right. If you have, if you’re somebody who has a lot of cycles available or you’re feeling. More stable in these times than a lot of other people are. I would consider that a privilege. Um, if you’re feeling dare, I say it, Uber creative right now, and you have the bandwidth to do that, then I feel like the onus is on us.
[00:10:25] I mean, this is inclusive leadership to me is sort of adjusting to what the need is and if it’s not your need, but it’s a need that others are experiencing. If you can activate some of that bandwidth on to answer that need, and you can hold space, you can convene, you can do the administrative stuff. You can maybe even pay for something that others can’t at a time when it’s needed.
[00:10:47] Like, those are the pieces of activating our privilege that are so important right now in
[00:10:54] Ed: [00:10:54] this space is amazing as well. And I admire what you guys are doing as well. I think that’s important.
[00:11:03] [00:11:00] Jennifer B: [00:11:03] Oh, yeah, for sure. Like I, and I’ve been doing a similar thing, a call twice a week. Um, I just mentioned it in the chat in case anybody wants to tune in, but it’s been, my world is diversity equity and inclusion, practitioners and advocates. So people who have the job of doing that in organizations and then people who want that job someday and also people who just do it, like, because it’s their passion.
[00:11:25] Right. And we’ve been joined by. A hundred people. Most of them are the same folks over and over because it’s the, it’s the spot they didn’t know they needed to connect.
[00:11:38] Ed: [00:11:38] I think one of the interesting things in the 19 gold city group is we don’t, we didn’t realize what we needed. He thought that it was a functional part of making that phone call or dialing into the zoom call.
[00:11:49] Then we realized that there was something else that we needed. And I think see through the progress of our group, it’s sometimes we needed, uh, emotion, [00:12:00] support people, you know, are their attitudes change completely based on just dialing in or, or, or that call. I told you earlier, uh off-screen that, you know, I have a, a dear friend of mine who’s retired and Cheetos in her retirement age to wake up early, early.
[00:12:18] You know, we have people who are going back to jobs. And I do remember when about two weeks ago, when we started talking about opening up again, The feeling of the group was anxious and I felt it. I felt it. I said, it’s other people acknowledged it that now our, our paradigm has shifted again. And now we’re trying to figure out what is the new norm and no one’s giving us guidance and you have to kind of play with it.
[00:12:42] Right. So we didn’t realize what we needed. We cried and cried before. You know, we we’ve send off, you know, when my husband had about redeployed again, Kobe, we didn’t know what that meant, that it’s scary. And the group felt my fear and they sent them off to work to back to the battle, right. To ground [00:13:00] zero.
[00:13:00] And so it was a very powerful cause I needed that. I needed that support. So my first day alone at the house and I, you know, I woke up and do my 9:00 AM call because I’m the leader and it was hard. And I think that we, we were don’t realize actually what we need. And I think that it’s important. For anybody out there listening, find your community, make the community.
[00:13:19] And if you don’t call us, we’ll help you find it. Because I think right now, No, both, all three of us are suffering in different ways. We have where we’re experiencing trauma in different ways. Um, and you know, we’re the lead, we’re the quote unquote leaders, but we also are going through things. Right. And I think it’s very important for us to remember to ask each other.
[00:13:41] When I talked to Jen once a week, you know, I make sure to ask her, how are you doing? Cause I want to make sure that, you know, we’re, we’re checking in with each other as well. And then, and that was one of our homeworks for everybody was to ask people. And in all caps, new, how are you doing? And the responses they got [00:14:00] were we’re crazy.
[00:14:01] We’re like, Oh God, like, you know, but it was great. It was beautiful. And I think that we need, I think, you know, the trauma that the world, and it’s not just us, right. The trauma of the world. Um, is experiencing, you know, they’re, they’re, they’re going to be longterm effects. I think back to what we’re talking about daily actions, right?
[00:14:22] You don’t have to do big things to save the world. You don’t have to do big things to save yourself one thing, or you can do nothing and nothing may be okay in the appropriate time. So we sometimes encourage our member of the 90th bullshitting group. Stop take a break. Don’t do nothing. Don’t call on Monday.
[00:14:40] It’s a, it’s a holiday weekend off, make it a weekend. Don’t work throughout the weekend, make it a weekend. Um, and, uh, stop working at night, work nine to five, like we normally do and then go do something and it’s okay. If on Wednesday you wake up at eight o’clock in the morning and you don’t want to dial in new watch Netflix that’s okay.
[00:15:00] [00:15:00] Right. And so we’ve gone through this process and I think it’s been, uh, an amazing, an amazing thing.
[00:15:07] Jennifer B: [00:15:07] Have you found that people have kicked and screamed their way into that? Relinquishing the control and kind of giving themselves permission to kind of just go and not wake up at their normal time or, cause I know.
[00:15:21] I’m definitely type a, to a bit of an extreme, I feel like I’m in I’m. I feel like I’m in recovery over being type a and I know that it’s not always my, the best thing for me, but it’s just kind of my natural default setting. So I know for me, it’s really hard to slow down or to say, you know what, I’m going to start working today.
[00:15:39] At nine instead of six 39, I normally start. So like, did you see resistance with people when you were kind of encouraging them to do this?
[00:15:48] Ed: [00:15:48] Yeah, so, so yeah. Yes and no. Right. So we have some personalities that might be told what to do. We have some personalities who need to stop doing what they’re doing.
[00:15:56] And one of our members who’s been actually with me since the beginning. And, [00:16:00] uh, she, and I know each other through a Latin X alumni organization. And she came with 50 things per day and I’m going to call her Kay. And I, and the whole group absorbed it and we absorbed it and we absorbed it. And then foster, like, you know what, I’m going to take a break or like, Oh my God.
[00:16:25] You realized it would be one thing. And if I don’t do that one thing it’s okay. And so actually seeing her. Transformation. And it’s not that she’s not productive, very productive. She runs a nonprofit, um, and she’s very productive, but it’s okay. And I think she realized that as, as you know, what was sustainable and what was not, she’s a brilliant woman, you know, but, but I think that acknowledging that it’s okay.
[00:16:47] I am, again, we have a group leader me and so I am fine to be conscious of those, you know, these permission. I think we sometimes do. Um, I [00:17:00] try to give my permission myself permission as well. So I work. Again, we talked about this before I work from Monday through Thursday, all day long and all night long.
[00:17:08] And then Thursday afternoon, I go for a long run and then Friday, if I get something done, it’s okay. And then Saturday and Sunday, don’t talk to me. I don’t want to talk to you. It’s my, it’s my moment to do whatever I want.
[00:17:20] Jennifer B: [00:17:20] Yeah. I love that. I think that the most sort of quiet days, which I’m sure the three of us are, the learning is actually taking the foot off the gas and.
[00:17:30] Like realizing that the sky is not going to fall. If we do that and know that less is in fact more right now. And if you are a leader and feeling the pressure of holding space for people and not able to share our own, like how do we put our oxygen mask on first? You know, I think it can feel depends how you experience holding space for others, whether you feel it’s depleting or it’s something that really fills you up.
[00:17:55] Right. Or maybe a little bit of both. So it probably depends on the day. Sometimes it feels like a [00:18:00] chore and like, wait a second. Like what about me? Who’s holding space for me. And then other days, you know, you have more that you can give and give and give, you know, because you have this reservoir. So it’s really interesting.
[00:18:10] Good. So tuning into that in a new way, because of all that,
[00:18:14] Ed: [00:18:14] you know, and part of the thing that we’ve done in the goal setting group, I think there’s also awesome. And I encourage everybody to do this as well. You just get your back to my armor, get to me for that armor. Right? Part of the, you know, we’ve done personality tests and done tendency testing.
[00:18:32] We’ve done vision boards, and I will talk about the vision board here before we go as well. What we realized is that this is a great opportunity to. And, and, and I know a lot of people are using the word learn, right. And learning is in my opinion, not, and we’re academics and we are business owners and stuff we learn.
[00:18:50] I think people, um, can arm themselves with tools. That will prepare us for the new normal. And if this ever happens again, which unfortunately might [00:19:00] happen to prepare us again at the arm yourself, or put on your shield, take a shower and, and, and dress up and then get the pools out there. Right. And so we’ve had coaches come to our group and taking office, you know, Uh, one of the coaches, uh, a great friend of mine, Carol Goss, she, um, I invited her and she’s like, what, what should I talk about?
[00:19:23] And you kind of talk through different things. And so what is our value system? You talk about that in our goal setting session, and we could have talked about it for hours and hours because our value system and the terminology that we use. Probably has changed before COVID and I’m during COVID and what changes came back into the normal self as example.
[00:19:44] So, um, because again, back to the, my frontline worker at home and the word owned, the word was interesting that I chose. So my three values, uh, or something like, um, [00:20:00] support, uh, learn. And then the other one was selfishness. Hmm. I would have never used the word selfish and selfish has a bad connotation.
[00:20:13] There’s better words than selfish. It’s imply protection. Right? So protecting my family, protecting. Um, my frontline worker at home, my husband, right. I chose the word selfish because it’s okay to have some of these negative thoughts in COVID. And I realized when I was set, I blurted it out. Well, my value system has changed is not good or bad dealing with the current situation.
[00:20:36] And you might change that value system again and, and talk about something else. Right? Um, another thing that we did well, he did breathing. Um, we had a brief, uh, one of my. Dear friends of mine. She’s uh, she does a lot of, um, breathing work. So yoga instructor, but being in boxing, breathing anxiety, I find myself doing breathing techniques.
[00:20:56] Um, to try to control anxiety and my [00:21:00] anxiety manifests itself, physically my breakout on me, everybody knows if I break out and read everywhere, how I control that anxiety also that’s I mean, these are tools and I think that arming ourselves with tools for the future right now in the present is a great opportunity for a lot of people out there.
[00:21:21] Jennifer B: [00:21:21] Um, it’s been. Horrifying incidents in the news the last couple of days, um, relating to racism and police brutality. And I had some friends, um, but I’m taking a mental health day today. I’m off. Like I can’t cope because of what I’m going through and what I’m feeling right now. So I’m going to disappear.
[00:21:45] And I’m assuming that, you know, that’s a, that’s a work day where people are literally like clearing the schedule and saying I’m not here. And I just wondered, um, as a member of the LGBTQ community, you know, we’ve had our, we’ve had our moments of grief [00:22:00] and grieving and anger, and then we all our allies on this call for communities that are in pain and we are in pain, therefore, uh, so I just wonder too, like, what are your.
[00:22:12] Great. What is the, what are the daily rituals? And I guess that’s a great example of something that is a something you can do and that your managers should give you permission to do. Of course. Right. I hope we all get the privilege of working for someone that says, if you need a mental health day, like just say to work, I mean, no questions asked, um, and that we are empowered to do that.
[00:22:37] But when you work for yourself, Or you’re in transition, you know, we have the power to say, you know, I need this time and I’m going to, I’m going to sort of feel the emotions and not need to be on camera, on zoom. I’m not gonna, like you said, I’m not going to need to show up for things. So, so I guess I wonder like the diversity lens on all of this is interesting to me because the sensitivity we need to have for each other as [00:23:00] well, and be aware of what might be going on for people also as a piece of that, I’m very acutely aware of, um, And then helping for the same grace in terms of what I need that too is so fundamental to our working together.
[00:23:14] You know, the, having that grace for each other. And I consider that one of the most beautiful silver lining that has come out of this is the, like the empathy for others. I hope that’s coming on this. If it’s not, you are truly have like a heart of stone.
[00:23:36] Ed: [00:23:36] Trauma or
[00:23:38] Jennifer B: [00:23:38] trauma.
[00:23:39] Ed: [00:23:39] Yeah. So for me, it’s running, uh, um, I I’ve always, I’ve lost 12 pounds during COVID and it was intentional, but part of it was this running. Um, I, uh, have experienced a death and I give, and I are talking, I talk about this in my life. Uh, and I running [00:24:00] my, my GoTo. Right. So originally, so. I think that one of the things that I, and this is, I talk about this all, all the time with people that, and I’m going to dump.
[00:24:10] So I’m going to wear one more hat real quick. Um, so I am the president of Ameritas of the Harvard Latino alumni association. Uh, Harvard’s official Latinix alumni group. And I’m now serving on VP of, sorry, nothing about the chapter leaders who I am now. Uh, it’s a, we’re very aware of like, like what, how we experienced trauma is also cultural.
[00:24:35] And I’m going to say this and know both. Okay. Um, these spaces, I think. And I think that I watched you guys and I applaud you for this. Um, sometimes the wins comes from. A white person lives. Okay. And so like how we share that, that, that trauma and how we ask the question about how we give people space of [00:25:00] different backgrounds.
[00:25:00] Like, do we actually understand maybe not right. And acknowledging I’m giving you space, but I don’t understand or may not understand your called I’m angry because I’m angry, but I don’t know why you’re angry and how your, your anger may be different than my anger. Right. And I really think that. Um, you know, one of the things that I try to do is I define safe place.
[00:25:20] I don’t find it. Right. And so, so, so, and, and part of that same place, when we come to a safe place, all of our expectations are different. Right? You can have rules, but like what we’re looking for, this isn’t a safe place. Right. Um, and I think that for us and for your viewers, And I think that, that how we define that is, is, is hard.
[00:25:41] It’s very personal. So I would say, um, we are going through, you will have, all of us civilians will have can TSP after this in COVID. Um, I went out for the first time, uh, uh, for a very long time and I had initial anxiety and when I bought my first Starbucks [00:26:00] coffee in. Nine, and we’re going to double and triple think how we do things.
[00:26:07] So we, that is that, is it trauma that we’re going to experience? So, so number one, part of this is one I call and again, no offense to anybody watching, uh, the abstract things that you don’t see in the functional things that we see abstract tool could be. Meditation, I call them abstract. I know that other, other practitioners may not, but for me as, as a Dewar, right on the bottom of functional guy, part of this is for me, is the, you know, how do you, how do you help yourself mentally, physically, and spiritually, and then the post, how you, how you do that and how you incorporate those three days, no things into your day.
[00:26:48] So I would recommend to anybody out there, if you are acknowledge that you’re experiencing trauma, And if you don’t realize we’re experiencing trauma, ask somebody around you and they’re probably gonna [00:27:00] say yes, and then they can probably list the reasons why, right. Acknowledge that. And then we’ll go into the real world.
[00:27:07] We’re going to continue experiencing trauma. Someone’s going to cough on you. Uh, I was actually on a business meeting with a, with a guy from Spain and one of them was sneezed and he literally at open. It’s not COVID because we all do this. I have a running nose and I haven’t had diarrhea. And he goes, I really, he goes, I normally wouldn’t say that in a meeting.
[00:27:30] Now we might it’s allergies. Right? And so I think that, you know how this is going to continue on and how we work with each other and how we talk to each other. So I strongly think that rituals find your, what I call abstract rituals. Many of you guys who are probably watching this, have those already stick to them, to them.
[00:27:51] If you meditate in the morning, when you wake up, keep meditating. Even when you’re tired, my ritual is I shower and I put on my shoes. I’m bringing shoes right now. [00:28:00] Um, um, for this call and the one you probably already have the tools and then the phone, what I call it, functional stuff is set those goals, use sticky notes and use your whiteboard.
[00:28:12] Use your telephone set reminders. And I think that the more, what I’ve seen in our, if you’d backward, our goal setting group is the more people started setting goals and doing things. They felt better. They were happier. And I noticed some of them would lie about taking their shower before they started taking a shower.
[00:28:32] We could all tell a couple of them, got out of bed and started doing their calls. Probably in front of there, you know, you know, sitting down and going outside, if it’s important to do these things. And I think those rituals are get that into that routine. That’s what you need to do. And that’s how you’re going to deal with that trauma.
[00:28:51] We already know. I think a lot of people, um, what needs to be done, we all have lists and lists and lists. So the question is, ask yourself, how [00:29:00] can you do them? Right? And, and, and, and it’s, it’s a process and acknowledging that we’re going through something. And it’s not just us. I have friends in China. I have friends, um, in, uh, Italy.
[00:29:11] I have friends in Spain. It’s not just us. Um, and knowledge acknowledgement. That’s
[00:29:16] Jennifer B: [00:29:16] important. I would guess that for some people it’s doing less as kind of the big, the big way for some people, like I know a lot of people that should be doing less.
[00:29:32] Ed: [00:29:32] I think that if you want somebody who knows who should be doing less than you have a responsibility, that’s your homework for me.
[00:29:41] And I think that that’s, you know, part of, um, Our responsibility as leaders, as well as to say, Hey, get back your, you know, and, and I’ve seen, I’ve done this a couple people in our goal setting group, actually one of our new members, newer [00:30:00] members, she was recommended. So I asked the, you know, anybody, I was one of your home with their homework.
[00:30:05] I give them homework. That’s what I do. You know, somebody. Who needs to be in this group. And Aaron was like, yup. Yup, yup. And we got a few new new people because we do know people who need to be in the group, do know people who need to take a shower, do know people who need to sleep and stop working and stop emailing at three o’clock in the morning, checking their phone.
[00:30:28] Stop looking at the news, stop, liking and posting and Sheree sharing. There’s a lot of NICUs negativity out there and all of the technology is, is a blessing, but it also takes away from our energy and positivity. And you may wake up and have a great 90 on goal setting. And then you see all this negativity on the news, like that’s functional stuff.
[00:30:47] That you’re seeing. Right. And it’s, it’s hurting me. And I think that we’ve had both, who’ve taken a technology break and that’s another thing that I would recommend to a lot of people. We have heard this on a webinar. [00:31:00] We have allowed work to come into our house. I’m in your house, I in your house and you’re in my house and how we set up the protection.
[00:31:09] We can’t leave. Home for work cause we are not working. Right. And how we set up these barriers are huge. And I think that each and every one of us as we let people into our homes, right. It’s a vulnerability when my dog starts barking. Um, or knowing that, uh, Jennifer, you don’t know this, but I have a maternal Christmas tree here in the corner.
[00:31:34] People don’t see that in the aspect was a private thing. It was my thing. It made me happy. Now I have to explain it.
[00:31:42] Jennifer B: [00:31:42] And then we bonded over it because I have a rainbow tree that I keep up year round as well. Like we’re meant to be, I’m going to be your publisher someday. Ed, when is your book out? By the way?
[00:31:56] Ed: [00:31:56] I’m worried I have during COVID. I decided that one of the things on my [00:32:00] long list of things here, uh, is to publish a few things. And I am currently in the process of working on a few things, not just one,
[00:32:11] Jennifer B: [00:32:11] I’m sure
[00:32:15] Ed: [00:32:15] we can progress. And I think that, you know, um, the last thing that I would like to share with everybody.
[00:32:21] Um, is that, um, it, you don’t have to have a list. That’s that’s me. Um, Jen and Jen probably have lists, but that’s us and it’s okay for you to wake up and conquer the day on the fly. Right. And that’s how you, that’s what you do. That’s okay. And I think that one of the most powerful things is, is just contact.
[00:32:42] Like you can get in contact, ask for help, um, share your story, talk to people. Um, use technology as a don’t use it, but use it in a positive way and again, arm yourself, uh, for, for what comes next. And hopefully next is [00:33:00] beautiful positivity frolicking in the woods.
[00:33:04] Jennifer B: [00:33:04] Such good science is such a great way to like punctuate the ending here of this compensation.
[00:33:09] And I think that the homework that we should ask of everyone. Is to go and ask someone how they’re doing, which you started off by saying, because I think, and listening to hear the answer, not just saying as a, a thing to fill air. And I think that that could be really revealing to just see how people are doing right now and calling each other out.
[00:33:29] If you need to. Slow down and Jen, I will, I’ll like, I could tell you to slow down. You could tell me to slow down, but I don’t think that counts we need, I think we need to tell like, somebody else to do that and someone else to tell us that so Naval or as for each other. So we need to, we need to cut that tie in that regard.
[00:33:48] I think it’s really freeing to hear that from someone. So thank you for all of this, just really good wisdom. And I’m hoping that those were watching. Take the opportunity to check out, because I know you have a Facebook group for the 9:00 AM, [00:34:00] 9:00 AM calls, which I think can be so valuable for people. So hopefully, you know, if you’re watching this and you, you need to be motivated to take a shower and put shoes on.
[00:34:08] And I think that could be a good first starting place for,
[00:34:11] Ed: [00:34:11] with that. So, ladies, I want you to go take a shower.
[00:34:15] Jennifer B: [00:34:15] Guiltiest barefoot too, by the way.
[00:34:28] Thank you so much. Hi ed. Thank you for joining us today by Jen gray. See you
[00:34:34] next time.